Completely not maille related today. I’ve been distracted by a tragic family event. Which you can go ahead and just read as someone died. I wasn’t completely shattered over it or anything as I didn’t really know her all that well. Even that seems like speaking ill of the dead…
She was family though, and watching the family I do know and love lose someone they were close to is still pretty rough on me. I spent the weekend sortof dazed, reading other blogs outside those I usually visit, and just generally ignoring everything.
I guess it’s probably best not to go into too much detail. It’s enough to say that at driving over to your Great Aunt’s place to see if she’s alright and finding out no one got there in time will screw with you a little bit. I can’t and won’t blame myself, or anyone else, it was just one of those horrible results of a horrible and careless mistake that ended her life.
The real bite of it all still goes back to the rest of the family. What can I honestly say to them? Nothing makes it all-right. I can’t just console people with things I don’t believe to try and make them feel better. I know trying to console them with my own thoughts won’t do anything but cause more damage.
So yeah, I’ve felt pretty useless the last few days, and because of that I’ve been pretty useless. Non productive, reclusive, and generally apathetic about anything I should be doing.